| Top 10 - What were they thinking?
| Wednesday, 27 August 2008
|Some games start off as a good idea and are let down somewhere between the initial idea and the final product. This can be down to a number of things: gameplay, controls, graphics etc. But some games however, were always doomed to failure due to clearly having someone drunk at the helm in the design process. Here are the top 10 ideas that should never have left the drawing board.
10. Gunstar Heroes: The board game level
I can imagine the scene now at the board room. "What would be a really good idea for an action packed run and gun game?" "Erm.....a board game level?" "Yeah that'll do, lets get some coffee." Why would anyone break up the otherwise action packed game with a slow, boring board game? If we wanted to play a board game we would raid the cupboard for Monopoly. Or at least buy one of the many Monopoly computer games.
9. Sonic Riders: Sonic on a board
Sonic is the fastest thing alive. It says so in the Sonic SATAM cartoon. Why would he need an airboard thing to win a race? Why would he even enter an airboard thing race? He can run faster than he airboards for Christ sake. Stupid.
8. Burnout Paradise: No restart
This one is kind of a double barrel stupid idea. First the creators decided to omit the option of restarting a race. There was a reason for it. The creators felt that it would interrupt the flow of the game. Which was fair I suppose. But what if you really wanted to come first in a specific race? Surely it would be best to allow the player the option of restarting the race and let them decide how the flow of the game should work? People complained a lot after playing the beta demo. Enter their second crap idea. Tell everyone who had played the demo and complained that they were, in fact, wrong. Good marketing idea there. Tell everyone that their opinions are wrong and that the game is actually awesome.
7. Fahrenheit: Dead guy sex scene
After commenting on how the main character doesn't seem to be breathing, the lovely lead female character proceeds to have sex with him. JUST. PLAIN. WRONG.
6. Phantasy Star Universe: Early Grinding
The weapons in the game were upgradeable by a process known as "grinding". The upgrade process is down to luck and during the early days if the grinding failed you lose your weapon. No second chance, no booby prize, just gone. This was eventually fixed but imagine spending ages finding enough money for a certain weapon only to lost it instantly. Many new swear words were invented due to that game.
5. Soul Calibur 4: Yoda
The creators decided not to allow players to change their custom characters height due to the possibility of creating characters short enough to duck under normal attacks. Yoda on the other hand cannot be hit by normal height attacks at all. The player has to crouch to hit the green git. This leads to massively unbalanced online and offline fights.
4. Army of Two: Suicide bombers
Suicide bombers are a touchy subject at the best of times. Some people can get a bit wound up with the thought of someone blowing themselves up. But that's not what makes the inclusion of suicide bombers stupid. What does make this a ridiculous idea is at least 10 people packing dynamite running at 2 guys. Surely even the most lacking of terrorist isn't stupid enough to sacrifice 10 men to kill 2?
3. GTA:IV: Liberty City minute achievement
GTA:IV has always been known as a game to enjoy at your own pace. Exploring the giant cities and making your own events have always been the highlight of the series. So for some reason Rockstar decided to include an achievement encouraging the player to rush through the game in 30 hours. This leaves little time to do any side missions during the main story, meaning you have to play the game in a linear fashion in order to get the achievement.
2. Mario: The Princess is in the other castle
If I were venturing forth through monster infested areas to rescue a fair maiden from the clutches of a giant evil dinosaur thing deep within a castle, I would sure as hell make sure I got the right castle. I'd hate to break into Warwick castle only to discover that she was actually being held in Edinborough castle. I would be livid. I would be even more suspicious if my nemesis was also in the castle. If he was also in the wrong castle, I would have had a clear shot at the princess if I had gone to the right one first. And why didn't that smug mushroom bastard find a way of letting me know sooner?
Ready for number 1? It's positively offensive.
1. Super Columbine Massacre RPG
Now this is a homebrew game, but it is such a stupid idea that I had to feature it. Take the most notorious example of the most notorious type of killings and make a game where you play the role of the killers! Genius! Some people should never have been allowed to leave the birthing shed.
Agree/disagree? Feel free to stop off at the discussion forum to add your own opinions.
Labels: Features, Top 10
|posted by goaferboy @ 11:00